Imagine a charismatic person in the same room with you.
What do you see?
I see a person who has his or her shit together.
It’s interesting because it’s hard to pin-point what exactly makes a person so charismatic.
You can definitely pick at least a couple of pointers that you notice, but it’s the whole package that does the trick.
Fortunately, charisma is something that you can learn. It’s not about how you look (though it gives some leverage to it), but how you act.
1. Be proactive.
Charismatic people take action rather than wait for something happening to them. They take responsibility for the situation.
Nothing kills charisma as quickly as being constantly reactive.
2. Be optimistic
Complaining, negativity – your life should be filled with so much more important things than those.
It doesn’t mean that you have to act happy, it’s more subtle than that. Stop complaining, stop making negative remarks and have more positive outlook on things.
3. Have a great posture
I fixed my bad posture by being consciously aware of it until it became something I did naturally.
Pull your shoulders back and your stomach in for starters. When sitting, always look for the most relaxed position. Lay back.
Walk like you have a cape. Be a superman.
A healthy looking body looks amazing with great posture. Start weight lifting and exercising.
4. Practice clear speech
You learned to speak by trial and error.
Then start practicing. At first talking by yourself may feel awkward, but you have to embrace it.
When I started learning a new language and was pronouncing the words, I got a bit uncomfortable with the thought of my neighbours hearing me.
I just kept going – nowadays I’m expressing myself fully when I’m alone and if the neighbours hear, it’s even more awesome.
5. Get comfortable with your insecurities
I know from experience that this is hard.
Bad experience can cause sensitivity about feature in you, but the reason why you stay insecure about it is because you unconsciously avoid the subject.
Instead of avoiding the negative emotional responses, embrace them. Feel them fully, dive into them.
You will notice that everything you resist or avoid emotionally, will stick. By embracing them they lose their power over you.
If someone points out something you are insecure about, the worst thing you can do is to react negatively, unless someone goes too far.
6. Get personal with people
Charismatic people make others feel worthy.
Be genuinely interested in people and keep a confident eye contact when listening.
Sometimes it’s a good idea to say less and listen more.
Give people value, lift them higher. That’s how great people make their company feel appreciated. The more you can help people without making a big deal out of it, the better.
Remember to keep it classy. There’s a fine line between being interested and intrusive/supplicating.
Take responsibility in the interaction. Be proactive, but remember to give some responsibility to other people too. There’s no need to do everything, when it comes to human interaction – it’s a two-way street after all.
Putting other people down is a big no-no. No one has lifted themselves higher by doing that.
7. Be composed
The opposite of being composed is to bitch about every little thing.
8. Improve constantly
Always be better today than yesterday, no matter how little. You will gain huge momentum by doing this.
Confidence comes from knowing what to do.
Start with what you are good at already. Find ways to improve your strong points and then focus on the weak ones. Exceptional people aren’t jacks of all trades, but they do few things very well.
9. Learn from charismatic people
Watch, then imitate. You can become great just by imitating the daily habits of great people.
“Fake it till you make it” has a bad tone in it. I’d rather say “Do it until you make it”. There’s really no difference.
If you don’t have anyone in your life who in your opinion is charismatic, head on to YouTube. I’ve put one great example to the bottom of the article.
10. You won’t “get it” just by reading these tips
You can get more charismatic by focusing and applying all the principles in your everyday life. It won’t happen instantly, as it’s a process like anything else.
You may have noticed that I left out confidence. I see confidence more as a result of living a great life where you constantly go out of your comfort zone.
When you know what you want and when you are not afraid to get it, you will become confident as well as charismatic.
“” the fictional Sony boss is a great example of charismatic behavior. Despite being an act, the charisma is very real.
He knows exactly what to do with the audience and trusts that they go along. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Be charismatic (wikihow)
Are you tired of feeling invisible? (self stairway)