I’ve had this thought in my head for a long time where we see our lives like a tunnel with several branches.
Each branch represents a “choice” that we make, but in a way I think that this is a flawed way of thinking.
Regardless of whether there’s free will or not, the past is a tunnel. There was always a reason why we chose to do something instead of choosing otherwise.
But how does this relate to judging people?
Everyone has gone through their own, unique tunnel. As I’ve gone through life and seen how (and why) I’ve changed over the years, I’ve come to realize that everything that I did made sense in a way.
All the social retardation, all the stupid things that I did. Even depression.
I’ve had this habit of putting myself in other peoples “tunnels”. I can’t of course know what kind of tunnel exactly they’ve gone through, but the hints are always there.
If I see someone who’s shy, reserved and doesn’t speak much, I can see someone who has been “punished” in one way or another for speaking their mind. Whether it has been their parents or other kids, doesn’t matter.
There’s always a reason why a person is as they are. We can never know precisely what makes them tick, but that’s irrelevant.
Just imagine yourself living through someone elses (painful) life and it may or may not open some new insights to how other people are.
One benefit was that I realized that it made me judge others a lot less.